Best Friend Speech

Shara and Leon, family and friends. And of course our batmitzvah, Honi.

I have known Honi since we were 4 years old and joined the reception class at North London. In our very first lesson on the first day, we sat together on the piglet table!

Since then we have always been best friends, and I know that we will continue to be for many years to come.

Honi is not like a normal best friend though. On the outside she may appear normal but on the inside she is , what I call, a bit random.

That though is what makes Honi so special and unique.

There is no one else like her. When we were 4, we emptied 4 bottles of paint on to her conservatory floor,  stripped down to our underwear and rolled around in the paint.

It’s safe to say that I cannot imagine doing that with anyone else.

Another way that Honi stands out from the crowd is her chocolate fetish.

I don’t think anyone else has an obsession with chocolate in the same way as Honi. When I’ve been with Honi, we’ve had chocolate fountains, chocolate fondants, chocolate parties, chocolate fondues, chocolate making, chocolate sleepovers and lots and lots of chocolate eating.

I’ll never forget the look of upset and despair on Honi’s face when she found out that Hotel Chocolat was only a chocolate shop and not a hotel made from chocolate that she was about to stay in for a week. She was already imagining a week in a chocolate bed, bathing in a chocolate bath,sitting on a chocolate balcony and swimming in a chocolate pool filled with chocolate.

She has now recovered from that shock and disappointment though, and Hotel Chocolat has become one of her favourite places in the world.

There are other favourite places for honi, but they are mainly not in this world, or indeed on this planet.

Many of Honi’s favourite places can only be visited by going through a wormhole into a distant galaxy. There you will find places like Galactic Sector ZZ9 Plural Z Alpha; Arkintoofle Minor and Emoticon 6 ( which is home to Eccentrica Gallumbits who has three breasts).

Some of you may be looking at me with slightly puzzled faces now, but the wormholes and Arkintoofles and triple breasted women, not forgetting characters like Slartibartfast, are all part of Honi’s favourite world in the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy.

Honi is a compulsive reader.

Not just of the Hitchikers series.

She can pretty much read a book over breakfast.

In the time it takes a normal person to eat a bowl of crunchy nut corn flakes and drink a cup of tea, Honi has read the Lord of the Rings from cover to cover.

That love of reading may be why she knows so much about everything. I bet if I asked her if she  knew the answer to the ultimate question of life, the universe and everything, she would know the answer.

42. See she knows everything. Sometimes I think she knows too much which is why she talks so fast as she has more words to get out than the rest of us.

Honi just excels at everything she does.

She was the only girl in  our class that knew the entire periodic table and the history of the atom when the rest of us were still learning the difference between solids and liquids! Although, as intelligent as Honi is, and she’s very smart – I think she may have had some help from somebody at home with that particular topic.

In all the years that I’ve known Honi, I’ve never heard anyone say a bad word about her. She is so kind and considerate.

We’ve had so much fun together over the years. I’m so pleased that you asked me to make this speech and be a part of your special day. You’ll always be my Best Friend!

Life with Honi is never ever grey and dull, it’s always full of colour and excitement, fun and laughter, especially if you’re rolling on the floor covered in paint.

Honi, You’re a very special friend, and I hope you have a great day!